It isn't Christmas till someone gets hurt!

So much to blog about! Things have been so incredibly crazy over the last couple of weeks that I haven't had time or energy to even think about blogging. Tonight, however, after consuming too many diet cokes, I'm wide awake and ready to blog. But I have to do some backtracking first!

Mom- Bless her sweet little heart! She went into surgery on Thursday, Dec. 18th at 9:00 am. She was actually scheduled to go in about 7:00 but things got delayed when it was discovered the stupid, I mean ignorant, nurse mistakenly gave her orange juice at six in the morning to bring her blood sugars up. Now, even I know how important it is to go into surgery with an empty stomach! The doctor and anesthetist argued for a good hour about the safety of proceeding. Finally, the surgeon's opinion won out and Mom was finally wheeled into surgery around 9:00. It was a long, grueling day for everyone involved and over ten hours later she came out of surgery and was placed in ICU. The surgeon met with all of us to report on the surgery. He was pretty arrogant, and feisty, but that was exactly what Mom needed. Everything went pretty much without a hitch and Mom did remarkably well, considering the condition she was in. The biggest surprise was when the pressure in her lungs actually decreased after the heart valve was replaced. That was the one issue which was most concerning. She actually had four procedures done, one to stop the fibrillation in her heart, one valve replaced, one valve mended with a plastic ring to help it to close properly, and a quadruple bypass on the blocked arteries. Just the fact that she was able to come off the heart/lung machine without complications was a miracle. But 'tis the season for miracles! Many miracles later, prayers answered, and blessings fulfilled and my Mom is on the mend. She came off the ventilator just a day and a half after surgery! She was moved out of ICU within three days! Had all tubes and IVs removed a couple of days later and now has only a feeding tube that is only used at night. She is scheduled to be released on Monday to a transitional unit in the Logan hospital where she will rehabilitate for probably another week. Considering the fact that even the surgeon went into this with a 50/50 prediction, I'd say she's done pretty darn good! Of course, the many prayers and blessings given might have had something to do with it! My mom is amazing, though, and we definitely had our Christmas miracle.

Now, Christmas at our house, on the other hand, was a different story! First of all, we were hit with the wretching gumboo a couple of days before Christmas. It hit a couple of kids and by Christmas day had worked it's way to Jay and I. Not a pleasant way to spend the most glorious day of the year! As many of you, it was a much more humble Christmas at our house this year so as we began opening presents we decided to prolong the excitement and take it one present at a time. Now, normally we start out that way but after a few rounds the kids get tired and we give the go ahead for a rip-fest. Anyway, Jordan was having a struggle opening a particularly difficult package and decided to break out his handy dandy pocket knife that his cousin had given him at the family Christmas party. You can guess the result! A sliced hand and emergency run ensued. Six stitches later, he rejoined the festivities. Of course, by then the momentum was rolling and the other kids didn't want to wait for his return so they finished up opening up their presents and Dad and Jordan opened their remaining presents when they returned. A little while later, Jordan went out to check on his dog in the dog run, only to discover the poor thing had expired in the middle of the night. So....Christmas was a "gut" wrenching experience all the way around from bathroom time, ER run and stitches, topped off with the demise of a beloved friend. I was never so happy to see a holiday pass! And that's saying alot because if you know me well, you know how great my love is for everything Christmas! We also were bestowed with over a foot of new fallen snow so travel of any kind was out of the question. Thank goodness we had enough good excuses not to venture out of the house!

That being said, I truly do have much to be thankful for. This past year has brought many significant experiences and blessed events. It's also brought difficulties, heart ache, and pain. But through it all, I know that the love of the Savior brought me through. I learned some great lessons, grew through the trials, found a part of myself that I had lost, and came to understand more deeply what the most important things in life are to me. I have an incredible family that I couldn't do without. I have awesome friends who support me even though they may not understand some of my life choices. Most importantly, I know my Heavenly Father loves me. What more could I ask for?

Another Mom update

My mom was admitted back into the hospital this morning. After suffering more chest pains, they determined the surgery cannot be postponed any longer. In fact, it's basically a do or die situation now. Because of the medications she's been on, they can't do the surgery for at least three days so now we just wait it out. She's stable right now and they are keeping a close watch on her. While we were there today, a code blue was announced over the intercom and after awhile the nurse came in apologizing about neglecting Mom but they had a patient "expire". We all dropped our jaws. I didn't think that was quite the appropriate time to make such an announcement! Anyway, things are a bit tenuous and we are hopeful.

Oh Christmas Tree!

The trees are up and decorated, the Christmas village is on display, the bells are jingling and whether I'm ready or not, the holiday is almost upon us. I haven't bought a thing yet, which is stressing me big time! It's going to be a lean Christmas at the Anderson household, but that's ok. That just means less for me to buy! I have this recurring nightmare that I wake up Christmas morning and all the kids are crying because Santa forgot to stop at our house. I madly rush from room to room trying to find something I can wrap quickly so they won't think this poor excuse of mom forgot about them! It's horrible! My heart races and I wake up in a cold sweat. This nightmare has plagued me for years. Maybe it's my subconscious worrying about disappointing my kids. I don't know, but it makes me nuts!

Since the coffers are bare, we decided that we needed to come up with non-monetary enjoyment. No snow so far, so sledding is out. Jay actually suggested caroling which threw me for a loop. Never, in a million years, would I have expected Jay to go along with anything remotely close to singing, let alone suggest it himself! I think we'll try and take a night and do just that! There is also a reindeer farm out west of town that we took the kids to one year. It was a huge hit and didn't cost us a dime, so if it's still up and running I think we'll make the trek out west. Gingerbread houses will be another fun activity I hope. My mom always made one for us that sat on the dining room table until Christmas day and then we all demolished it piece by piece, stale crusty stuff that it was! I'm running out of ideas, though, so if you have any great brain fluffs, let me know! My kids would appreciate it!

Update

I should've written this post a few days ago but as you can imagine things have been somewhat hectic. First let me say thank you for the prayers and words of support. It's always a tough thing to have to face mortality. My sweet mom started in with chest pains again on Tuesday night/Wednesday morning. In fact, about the same time that I wrote my last post. Anyway, they took her in for another angioplasty and this time discovered another blockage in one of the arteries that was about 90% blocked. The doctors decided that was the artery causing the heart attacks and they were able to open it up and place a stint in to keep the blood flow going. They also discovered that my mom has pulmonary hypertension, or high blood pressure in her lungs. That dramatically changes the picture for her surgery. After discussing the situation with the surgeon, the cardiologist decided they needed to wait to do the surgery. The biggest concern was whether Mom would be able to come off the ventilator after surgery or if she would remain on a vent for the rest of her life. They feel that by opening up the one artery the heart should be getting enough blood and oxygen now. We were all shocked and questioned why they didn't just do the surgery when she started having another attack, but the doctor told us that if they had proceeded without knowing everything they know now, we probably would've lost her. So....the gist is this...Mom was sent home on Saturday. No surgery for at least a month. In about two weeks she'll go back in to the cardiologist at which time the decision will be made whether to proceed with a surgery or whether the risk is just too great. Talk about an emotional roller coaster! I just want them to "fix" her. I hate thinking about what could be or might be or probably will be. Dad gave me the whatfor and told me I had to buck up and think positively. He's right, of course, but it's hard when I see my mom looking so frail and helpless. So, that's the update. Jay and I went to visit her last night and although she's still very weak, she was at least sitting up. Bless her heart!!!! PLEASE!!!!

We're also preparing to send Brinlei's bmom to Hawaii for Christmas and then on to the islands after. It's going to be so sad to see them leave! We have loved having them here and they've just become a part of the family. Even Jordan and Jaxon said they will miss little Sissy. It has been such a great experience for all of us to have them in our home and I think it has validated Brinlei in ways I didn't expect. Her relationship with her bmom is so sweet to watch, almost like they're sisters. I know it's going to be hard for her to say goodbye to them.

The Saturday after Thanksgiving, we were privileged to be a part of Brinlei's mom's baptism. It was such an incredibly spiritual event for all of us. She looked absolutely beautiful all dressed in white. After the baptism we took the family down to temple square to see the Christmas lights. It was a bit hectic and chaotic, but we loved it just the same. It was just a great way to start the Christmas season and share in it with Brinlei's mom and sister. Now if I can just get my decorations up at home, it'll really feel like Christmas.

(Ok, these pictures didn't load in the right order, but oh well!)

Quickie

It's 3 am and I can't sleep. I spent a good part of the day at the hospital with my mom and now my brain won't shut off. She's doing ok, although we got some news today that isn't the best. The docs have decided they will need to replace the valve in her heart that is leaking, on top of the quadruple bypass. She also has fluid in her lungs, but after some testing they have determined that it isn't pneumonia and is just an effect of the heart attack. She's in good spirits and seems to be a little stronger. Hopefully by Friday she will be even stronger and ready to take on the scalpel!

Life's lessons

I started a post last night detailing all the fun and excitement of Thanksgiving when I was interrupted by a phone call from my oldest brother. You know, there are defining moments in life that change the course of thought and actions. Well, that phone call was one of those moments. He gently told me that my sweet mother had suffered a heart attack and had been life flighted to a hospital in Ogden. Those first few moments were filled with shock and fear as I contemplated what this would mean, not only for her but for my entire family.

Within a few minutes my sister and I were on the road to her bedside. I will never forget looking into my mother's eyes and seeing a fear I had never seen before. She's my mother, you know. The one who always made me feel safe and protected and now she was looking at me, searching for the comfort and peace she had always bestowed on her children. I wasn't prepared for that. She looked so frail laying there in that big hospital bed and I wanted nothing more than to be able to hold her in my arms. She was stable and as comfortable as could be expected, and felt silly for all the attention she was generating. That's my mom for you!

The night was a restless one for her, followed by numerous tests, pokes, and prods. It was determined that yes, she had suffered a heart attack and will need to undergo open heart surgery to repair the four arteries that are blocked, along with a few other issues needing to be addressed. The surgery will take place on Friday and we are hoping and praying all goes well. There are still uncertainties and concerns, and the doctors have said there could be further complications but the only way to know exactly what they're dealing with is to proceed with the surgery.

Experiences like this certainly put life into a different light. Those things that seemed so important and all consuming now seem trivial. What does it really matter if the laundry doesn't get finished, or if the house isn't spotless? There's nothing written that says I'm a terrible mom if my kids don't get a bath every night, or if they are five minutes late for school. It's the little things that mean the most. I hope I can stop for a few minutes and recognize where my priorities need to lie. The thing that matters the most is my family, both immediate and extended. Nothing else should take precedence. Nothing!